Work Hard or Dream Better?

Work hard or dream better? Well, we know which we would prefer to be doing. Unfortunately, we believe not only are dreams not possible without hard work but, ‘If we are not willing to work hard, then we are left dreaming’.

We do both well though one of them is generally not by choice.

Dreams are easy. Not the kind that take their own course during our unconscious, sleep state. Rather, the stories we deliberately tell through the convenient power of our imagination.

Dreams are inflated thoughts. They are images not yet present to our senses. But they want to be. We could be sitting on our sofa and yet be swimming in the turquoise blue lagoon waters of Bora Bora, driving our black on black Porsche or enjoying financial abundance. However, sitting on our sofa is not going to get us any closer to these fantastic fantasies unless we get up and get working for them.

Though they are fantasy they also fall heavily on our hopes and aspirations. And in order to have or do the things we want we are well-aware we must work hard for them. Or do we?

Regardless of how diverse our goals, desires and dreams are, we can agree it is the achievement of them that establishes success.

Moreover, most of us accept and conclude the only route toward success is through hard work. We equate success with struggle and believe our accomplishments and successes are heavily drenched in our blood, sweat and tears.

It would seem logical an action-based physical world would require action for any sort of manifestation or victory. Obviously, success cannot fall into our laps simply by lounging on the sofa dreaming of success.

The extra weight is not going to burn off by looking at photos of slimmer looking people. That trip to Europe is not going to magically appear by sifting through travel YouTube videos and that cake we have been craving is not going to get baked by researching recipes on Pinterest. We need to work for what we want. And the ‘bigger’ the dream, the harder we will need to work at it.

“You get what you work for, not what you wish for” by Daniel Milstein is also a view held by the majority. We have been conditioned into this belief since childhood. The index finger shaking at us with assertion reminding us that ‘nothing is for free, money does not grow on trees, bills do not get paid on their own and our grand dreams are unrealistic fantasies without hard work’ haunts our every action.

We want things to be simpler, but we are too often reminded that being a Warrior is the only way to success and happiness through the echoing voices of our parents, family, and friends.

It all just seems like too much effort.

We can accept that through physical action and choices we control the direction of our experiences and only those who are willing enough to contend with adversaries or opposing force and push through with perseverance will fulfill their dreams. Only those who are willing enough to crawl through the mud of their fears, climb the tall concrete walls of their obstructions, swing on the ropes of risk and speculation, withstand being beaten and battered over a long period of time and plough through like Warriors will qualify for the attainment of their fantasies.

This whole idea about optimistic thinking and dreaming our way to our desires is laughable. However, we also understand or at least carry the belief that successful Warriors are minorities. Surely there must be another way to fulfill our desires without having to put ourselves through the mill and extract every drop of sweat, blood and tear in trade for some happiness.

We are cautious about expressing desire for an easier route to our dreams as it is suggestive of a free pass and makes us sound lazy. We want the dramatic, awe inspiring story of victor but it just seems too arduous and exhausting to get there and we are not all built like these Warriors.

We know that Warriors despise ‘lazy’ people who want something for nothing. Warriors wear their struggles like a badge of honor and no Warrior wants to know that there was a short cut to their destination. This reputation of strength and overcoming cannot be swiftly smeared by someone who outsmarted them with mere optimism. They will not stand for it. They know that a true Warrior is one that crosses the finish line with great vigor, dignity, perseverance and courage and deserve the respect this title holds. They refuse to let their efforts be tarnished with this new-age nonsense. They refuse to credit or even acknowledge anyone whose successes, gains, and triumphs were instant and effortless.

We fault what comes easy. In fact, we reject and criticize it, particularly those among us who continue to have it ‘easy’. This group typically carry an ‘everything works out for me’ attitude that can be inexplicably annoying to hard workers. They are the minority group we gossip about because we feel it is unfair the ‘hard work’ rule does not apply to them while others are saturated in suffering. It brings up feelings of bitterness and resentment. And the more we recognize our own struggles the more cheated and resentful we feel toward those who did not struggle to have what we dream of. After all, what makes them so special?

Clearly, someone is doing the hard work for them. We are convinced they are either a product of privilege or they are involved in illegal affairs and deemed as lucky and underserving.

Nevertheless, we get it. We understand the need to study hard and work hard for a better life. A life of happiness, fulfillment and abundance. And we believe this wholeheartedly.

Except, we study hard and work hard and while some may have that break-through of success, majority of us are left working hard for what seems like the rest of our lives never quite reaching that dream or pinnacle of success.

Through our attempt to make sense of our fruitless misfortunes, we interpret it as if it were not written in our cards. We believe we were not one of the chosen few, accept this as part of a pre-scripted journey and bitterly place ourselves in the average pile along with the rest of the hapless victims.

Subsequently, we decide to change our goals, minimize our dreams and re-define our perspective of success until some new, manageable and undemanding way arises. Except, surrendering and agreeing to a mediocre life knowing that our beloved dream is not going to simply disappear or dissipate weighs heavier on our heart because it continues to demand our attention.

Many of us, if not most, succumb to the falsified realization that it just will not or cannot happen for us and trade in our dreams for something a little more ‘realistic’. Something that is a little more in our reach. Something that is quicker achievable, even if left feeling unsatisfied. We accept our current reality, admit we were not one of the lucky few born with Warrior strength, get our head out of the clouds and focus on what we pathetically can do in the meantime.

If our philosophy of success is hard work, why are we disheartened with the grueling face of reality, discouraged with the illimitable effort toward a hollow abyss whilst many of our dreams end up decomposing in landfills along with our hopes and optimism?

Did we not work hard enough? Are we mostly dreamers? Maybe it has to do with luck and chance. After all, not all artists and writers can be famous. Not all businesses can blossom or thrive, not all can be blissfully in love and not everyone can be rich.

Or so we believe.

So, what separates those who do and those who do not fulfill their dreams? This leaves us with more questions than answers for not all have worked hard to fulfil their dreams and not all hard workers have reached them.  

And what defines hard work? Is it the amount of time spent pursuing the dream, the number of obstacles overcome or is it the combination of both, that earns our title of bravery? How much time is acceptable to satisfy the dream fulfillment criteria?

Sometimes the answer lies not in our questions but is buried deep in our current beliefs.

What if Daniel Milstein got it mixed up? What if in fact, you get what you wish for and not what you work for? Most of us would think this is bogus. If we all got what we wished for we would be living our dreams instead of our struggles right?

The answer is a hard yes!

Not only do we always get what we wish for, we get what we give our undivided attention to. However, what we are attentive to is not always what we wish for. If we are living our struggles, then it is obvious where our emphasis is. Unfortunately, even as the Masterful Creators that we are, we remain unconvinced of our creative power and control.

We cannot point our camera toward the ground and hope to take a photo of the sky. We cannot spend months learning the Spanish language and hope to be fluent in Russian. And we cannot want financial abundance yet spend every waking moment focused on its absence.

Ultimately, believing we must work hard for our dreams is about physically making things happen. But if we are the creators of our own reality, must we be struggling to manifest them? And if we are struggling then doesn’t that mean we are focusing on obstacles than our desires?

When time seems to pass us by and we are nowhere near our dream, we have mastered not our dream but our contrasting views about them. We are thinking and telling the same replicated stories of fear and doubt, holding onto the same negative emotions and maintaining the same conflicting behaviors, perspectives, and attitudes that keep them at bay.

Our dreams matter. What we think, imagine, and believe is the basis to all our success. If we cannot get our thoughts together and focus on our dream, then no amount of hard work is going to get us there.

When it feels like a struggle or hard work, it is always because we are pushing through some sort of resistance. This resistance is our own doubts, fears, and negative mind chatter. It is every ‘What If?’ and pessimistic opinion our family ‘lovingly’ shared. It is all the uncertainty surrounding this dream we gathered along the way and much of what we felt we had to sacrifice to get there.

What transcends thought into our physical reality is our focus upon them and our emotional attachment to them. Nothing changes unless there is an emotional shift and unless something shifts, our experience cannot change.

We move when we feel inspired otherwise, we are just going through the motions.

Like the story of a couple of miners who shared a dream of discovering gold. One sacrificed time away from his family in pursuit of this dream. In fact, he gave up much of what brought him joy. He understood the difficulty of this dream so had prepared himself for a long, hard journey. He was right but he was also determined. This determination and bravery had helped him overcome many obstacles including his health as he continued to work around the clock through dust, heavy metals, hazardous gases, and fumes. Though he did not find his large, shimmering nugget, he was successful enough to have discovered small fragments of gold which only made him work harder.

The other miner had stayed home taking care of his farm. He knew his dream would one day become reality. He did not know when or how but knew some day he would be holding onto his golden prize. One day during a trip to the grocery store, he was inspired to walk into the local hardware shop. He was not particularly looking for anything but felt the urge to walk in anyway. As he approached the outdoor equipment isle, he bumped into an old friend who had at the last minute decided to purchase a fishing rod. After some rambunctious conversation, his friend had extended an invite to join him fishing at a charming spot by a local river he had recently heard about. They met that afternoon and as they laughed and chatted, a faint sparkle had caught the miner’s eye under the water. At first, he thought it was the shimmer of the stream but when he looked closer, the sun’s rays were lighting it up like a starburst. He curiously stuck his hand deep into the river and plucked out a very shiny, very large, gold nugget.

Was it, chance? Was it, luck? The story would be different had he not entered the hardware store that day. But are stories like these simply coincidence? Was the second miner less deserving of his dream because he did not work hard for it?

Stories like these happen every day when we are not trying to figure out all the details of our hopes and dreams, and when we are not expecting to be working our butts off for them.

Unfortunately, many of us often stop trying before our dream punctures into our reality because we do not know when it will or how it will come to fruition. We become so consumed in planning our every step, working out the best possible solutions, mapping out our journey, and attempting to force doors to open that we would not recognize our dream if it stood right next to us.

In other words, there are multiple avenues to our desires and often none of which we plan for.

Mostly because we are trying to figure out how to get to our dream based on where we are in our current reality with our current funds and limited resources. Wanting that dream home is always going to seem like a distant dream when we are counting our pennies every day. Reading articles on how difficult and impossible it is for artists to make it in a ‘dog-eat-dog’ world. Or listening to people who give us a list of reasons why our business could not succeed due to lack of business sense or dooming economy is inevitably and unnecessarily accepting obstacles.

“Success is 99% attitude and 1% aptitude” is an accurate statement made by Celestine Chua. If confidence, optimism, eagerness, and trust is the energy we ignite our dream with and we move toward it maintaining our excitement for it; it has already become our new reality. For now, that which we want, wants us also.

When a dream is formed through our imagination, it has already been given life. We have begun the process of creation. However, just like a baby is not born the moment it is conceived, so too do our dreams require some time to cultivate, in order to perfectly develop into the exquisite creation we summoned.

We would not want our dream to appear the moment we imagined or desired it for we too require some preparation time. In fact, we always receive what we prepare for. More importantly, it is the journey, development, detailing, and creating that is part of the fun.

Anything we physically experience is an emotional desire. It is not the action, condition or object we crave, it is the emotion we believe they will gift us. Except, they do not come with emotions. We are those who attach emotional labels to these physical manifestations. Money is just money until we believe it will give us the experience of freedom and power or perceive it is evil and destructive.

The emotions we feel surrounding a dream, belief or vision is simultaneously being fully experienced by us. All our experiences are emotional. Without the emotional attachment to our desires, opinions, and beliefs they remain dormant. The physical manifestation of them is merely thought ‘left-overs’ we have been masticating for some time.

There are too many moving parts in the universe, and we do not have the capacity to synchronize them to work in our favor. But it is not our job to. Our job is only to be intuitive enough to act when we feel inspired. That too is easy because inspiration is like an instant craving we feel, and cravings are hard to ignore. It is also the fulfillment of them which makes them so satisfying.

When we understand we are not responsible for controlling the details of our desires, we can relax and enjoy the journey. When we understand we need only to know with absolute certainty that it will happen, it is already becoming.

In the meantime, dream bigger and with complete expectation. Immerse yourself in the dream is such detail that you can see, hear, taste, touch and feel its presence. Sift through YouTube videos or magazines that inspire and ignite your passion. Plunge into conversations about this dream.

Know that it is all coming together. Feel as if it already is and watch how things unfold and flow easily to you.

Plan for your dreams not the obstacles. Prepare for your desires and not your fears. Believe in yourself and not others. And trust that it is always working out for you!

If you dream them, they will come! Dream them fiercely, creatively and confidently!